Ineffectual Management

[Grumpy Humbug]

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Spoke with the ineffectual office manager the other day about trying to shift some of my caseload to some of the lazier less busy paralegals, and how I continue to get the lion's share of new work despite being overloaded.

Her response?  I need to get a stress ball.

Yep. 

A futhermucking stress ball will supposedly fix everything. 

Counting to ten.  Breathing deeply...

[Grumpy Humbug]

I ripped my stress ball into several pieces.  Should I send it to her via inter-office mail?

[Corporate Paralegal]

You have a stress ball with you every day.  Look down your right arm or left arm and make your fist into a ball.  Then go beat the office manager until your stress goes away.

Or at least dream about it....since I should probably not be advocating violence.

[ParalegalHell]

A stress ball!  That is hysterical!   I love the idea of sending it back to her in pieces.
And now I can't stop laughing because I am imagining you ripping your stress ball and screaming "Grumpy Rip!"

[paralegal_chachacha]

Don't you love saccharine little responses to legitimate concerns?

Go get yourself that stress ball... and proceed to throw it at said office manager's skull.  That's the way to actually relieve tension with a stress ball!

[SCParalegal]

Stress ball is freakin crazy !   Here is mine:  "This too shall pass"

That quote is now my most hated phrase in the english language.

[Grumpy Humbug]

It is what it is.

Really?  What else could it possibly be?  And why can't we do anything about "it"?

[Corporate Paralegal]

I HATE "It is what it is."  What "it is" is Shit!  "It" can be changed if you would just get off your lazy butt and do something about it.  I am going to start using this expression when I turn in half-baked research projects to my GC.  Hey - it works for him when he is trying to justify not giving me a raise.